heart-song

"a friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." author unknown

open

i've had the words 'live vulnerably with Father' going round and round in my heart the last several months. i know there are still painful places in me that i just as soon no one poke around in (particularly *God* [calling Him that makes Him, in my mind, the emotionally distant, angry Being i grew up with for some reason. i hear *Father* so very differently]) - because that just might mean some more pain 1) looking at that stuff in the light, and 2) having it dealt with.

then i remember He is Father and that He is Love and Gentleness and Kindness and Mercy, not angry and distant and unmoved by my plight - and that Love holds me and keeps me from falling to pieces while the pain is uncovered and healing brought.

i am learning to know and rely on Love...

and to live with arms open...

and to trust the holding power of Love when it hurts.

inhale

this from a new friend in Father:

"This air we breathe. It's an amazing thing given by God for life. We only can have enough for one breath at a time. I mean, it's all around us, but when we breathe, we do not stop inhaling because we have taken in all the oxygen we will ever need. Rather, we have all the oxygen we need for THIS breath. Then we exhale, release carbon dioxide, and make room for more oxygen."

Bryan Waters

to which may be added -

selah

anything...

"God can do anything, you know...

...far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us." Eph 3. 20-21 The Message

as I ponder on this again - He has done incredible things for us - because He loved us and came - because He took on flesh and dwelt among us - because of the incarnation - I am again blown away - because He whispers in my heart - not in the whirlwind or earthquake but in a soft whisper - eternity whispers - oh my - this is too great - who can grasp it? - the eternal One in our heart.

Selah

this Jesus...

... the Jesus i am coming to know is the One Who had friendship/fellowship with the tax collector, the woman 'caught' in adultery, the little girl who was 'dead', the father whose heart was breaking because of his son who continually threw himself into the fire. the Jesus i am coming to know is the One Who did not withdraw Himself from the woman with the issue of blood. the One Who in essence said, 'phooey on the laws of the sabbath' and healed all over the place on that day - because He is the Sabbath and He was being true to Himself. the One Who loved us so much that He became incarnate - that we might be connected to Him, His Father and the Holy Spirit in that glorious, eternal relationship/fellowship - that dance that many of His saints talk about.

the Jesus i am coming to know dislikes [understatement] the actions of those who use, abuse and mislead folks. He seems to not have a whole lot of patience with the religious who will not see - and who hinder others from seeing Him as He is. the Jesus i am coming to know was and is moved with incredible compassion regarding mankind's blindness and chosen ventures into the pig pens of the world.

the Jesus i am coming to know doesn't keep a score-card on me - or on any one else. He has more patience with me than the ocean has drops of water. He doesn't beat me - or anyone else when our lives get messy. He gives me His hand, lifts me up out of my crippled place and enables me to jump, run and walk with Him.

the Jesus i am coming to know is so very eager to teach me Who He is - to take away the structures in my mind which argue against Him. He delights in freeing me from the chains of sin which bind me in order that i can experience the freedom and grace of His life.

i could go on and on - but perhaps by now, you get the picture - Jesus the express image of the Father - yahoo!

this Jesus - and more and more - as i am willing to set aside that wearisome burden of living in the imaginations of my making [and the world's, the flesh's and the devil's] as to who He is and saying yes to His life and Who He is, is the One i am coming to know.

in our brokenness...

the following taken from an article on a special blog


"Discovering Jesus in the dungeons of our brokenness means that we do not have to dream of a Magical Other or plaster our dream upon their face and demand that they live up to our unearthly expectations. And it means that we do not have to impose our agendas upon the lives of our friends, or of creation. Discovering Jesus in the dungeon means we are free to live in and out of the real dream of the Father, Son and Spirit, for now our adoption is no dream at all, but the simple truth. We are included in their shared life. The Father, Son and Spirit have pitched their tent inside our dungeon. Such a discovery is the beginning of faith and repentance (a radical change in the way we see), and it is the beginning of the freedom to accept others and to be accepted, to know and to be known, to love and to be loved, to delight and being delighted in."

C Baxter Kruger http://baxterkruger.blogspot.com/2009/12/expectation.html

today...

... hear His voice


It never ceases to amaze me - tucked in here and there - in the most unexpected places - one stumbles over the fact that He has always desired to reveal Himself to us.

Moreover, this revealing is quite often to the unimportant, insignificant, no-name no-power folks in society.

Case in point: a few weeks ago I was finishing reading a historical novel about, as it turns out, a key figure in the linage of kings and queens of England.

There it was, tucked into the last quarter or so of a very long book. A simple person is brought into the story - one to whom He had revealed Himself. Surprisingly, a woman - not a man, nor priest, nor bishop or pope. Not even to a king or prince - or princess. Her name was Julian - Julian of Norwich.

In England in the 1400's, He visited Julian in order that she might know Him - not as the religion of the day portrayed Him. The religion of pilgrimages to various shrines to pray to whatever relic was being touted - maybe a little toe bone of saint so-and-so, or a vial of the milk of Mary, or a thorn from the crown given to Jesus, or a splinter from the spear of the Roman soldier.

He cut through all that and spoke to her of His great love for His creation. He made Himself known as Love - pure and simple and true.

It was a time of believing God was distant and very angry with folks. A time that believed He had to be appeased in any way possible - the longer and more difficult the pilgrimage, the better. The more money given to the shrine keepers, the better.

It was a time of fear of excommunication and damnation. A time which did not know - nor even consider - that Father just might not be as religion said. Oddly enough, and though it may look a little different, we have many similar beliefs and practices today regarding God.

Father made Himself known to this woman - this humble person. She, in turn, shared this with Catherine - the key person in the English king/queen linage.

Catherine was in the most devastated place of her life with no hope on the horizon. Among other very difficult circumstances, she had suffered the loss of a child, for which she blamed herself. Catherine made a pilgrimage of many weeks by herself to a shrine. Having received no answer to her prayer of help for her child, she attempted suicide. In the midst of attempting suicide, a man of the cloth rescued and introduced her to Julian. Time spent with Julian made all the difference.

Time spent learning Him - made all the difference.

Whether this actually happened - whether Catherine met Julian - I don't know for sure. That is not really the point.

The point is that, throughout all the years and centuries, there have been folks who heard Him - mostly in a way that cut right across the practices and teachings of the day.

There have always been those who would hear...

There still are those who hear...

and listen...

and pay heed.

I AM...

... the way

... the truth

... the life


I am the journey - manner of thinking, feeling, deciding

I am what is true - in any matter under consideration

I am life - real and genuine, active and vigorous

tuning in...

How many times do we hear something - and say something - and agree to and with something - and then - all of a sudden we get the ‘ah-ha’ about it?

When we stop jibber-jawing in our mind - and in our conversing/praying with Father - long enough, we just might hear what His heart is. We just might hear what He is talking about - what He desires to talk about with us - what He desires to do.

If we would just shut up and listen up - oh my! If we would just be still and know that He is. And that the *He is* is not some silent stump that we pummel with all our words and thoughts, but, in human terms, a living, breathing being, perhaps we would not find ourselves in the stews we get into about knowing His will or what pleases Him and/or walking with Him, where to go, what to do, what to say, etc, etc, etc.

in praise of the ordinary... take 2

came across this the other day -

“In the entire history of the universe, let alone in your own history, there has never been another day just like today, and there will never be another just like it again. Today is the point to which all your yesterdays have been leading since the hour of your birth. It is the point from which all your tomorrows will proceed until the hour of your death. If you were aware of how precious today is, you could hardly live through it. Unless you are aware of how precious it is, you can hardly be said to be living at all.”

Frederick Buechner

created to sing

a wonderful picture - enjoy

The Canary That Didn't Sing - by Mike M - posted July 8, 2010 @ 8:19 am on Free Believer’s Network

My father was a man of many interests one of them being raising redfactor canaries. I would venture to say about half of his time off from work was spent caring for those orange birds. When you hear the word canary what comes to mind? A majority might say singing. Canaries are beautiful songbirds. Did you know that canaries learn to sing from their parents? Did you know that each family of canaries has its own particular song and everyone in that family sings a variation of that song? They are fascinating creatures.

My dad built an aviary in our back yard that still stands there to this day. At the height of his hobby he had upwards of 300 birds out back. That’s a lot of racket let me tell you! But the neighbors never complained. That would be like complaining that a rose is too beautiful. So I want you to picture my dad in that fully enclosed aviary with 300 birds sitting for hours just observing. Each chick that hatched would get a band put around its leg, like a serial number. Even though they were all in there together, my dad could go single out a particular bird and then show you its mother, father, and siblings.

So what was he doing in there for hours on end? Mostly he was just enjoying them. He would pay particular attention to his good singers. Those he would sell as pets to families and little old ladies that needed the company of a songbird. He would also pay special attention to any birds that sang seldom. A quiet canary is a sick canary. Isn’t that something? How do you tell an animal is sick? He can’t tell you. But it’s pretty simple actually. Every animal under heaven has a purpose. And when that animal isn’t fulfilling its purpose, it usually means there is something wrong.

As a canary sings, so we were made to praise Jesus. It’s as if our genes compel us to praise our savior. Do you praise God like a canary sings? If not, the Master wants to tend to you and heal you. He knows you by name apart from all of the rest of humanity. He sits there with a smile on His face listening. Did you know that birds that don’t sing early on in their lives are more likely to contract diseases? So that means that the healing comes in the song. Did you get that? The healing comes in the song. We were meant to give God glory, honor and praise. And when we sit on our perch with our beaks tightly shut, we begin to deteriorate. And then the Master comes to us in our silence and says, “Why aren’t you singing? What has you down?”

Do you know how beautiful it is to hear someone sing in spite of his or her pain? Do you know what that kind of song does to the heart of God? It melts His heart into a puddle. I sang like that during my divorce. I could not be silent. I needed Him more than life itself. And He heard my song above all of the others. He took notice of me for I called to Him and He came! And He comforted me like a husband comforts his bride. I know it hurts to sing when you are drowning in pain. But there is healing in the song.

Side note:When my dad died, I called up an old friend of his he hadn’t seen in years. I gave him the news of my dad’s passing and he was shocked and dismayed. I asked him if he would do my dad one final favor. Since it had been at least a decade since my dad had any birds, I asked his friend Tony if he wouldn’t mind bringing one of his canaries to my dad’s funeral. Tony did, and I guess that was just one of the many special ways I said goodbye to my father.

found at:

http://www.facebook.com/notes/the-free-believers-network/the-canary-that-didnt-sing-by-mike-m/413369733010

shall we dance?

“To give that mystery its proper theological name, it’s the coinherence of the three Persons --- in all their acts and in every aspect of their essence – in the unity of their “Godness.” But the most fascinating thing about this coinherence is that it rubs off on the world that the Trinity brings forth. When God creates man in his own image, for instance (“man,” just to remind you, is the ‘adham, male and female), he makes us into beings totally in love with mutual indwelling, with walking into, with dancing into relationships at every turn of our lives. For one thing, he’s made us positively wild about turning two people into “one flesh” in marriage. For another, he’s made us just as driven to implicate ourselves in friendships, families, towns, cities, and states. He’s made a sociable world. And when we (at our best) dance our way into that creation, it becomes a vast ballet of coinherences.

“But it’s not only human creatures who are made in the image of this dance. The whole natural order – from the nearest grain of sand to the farthest star – is just as much an image of the mutual indwelling of the Persons of the Trinity. Nothing in creation acts or exists by itself; everything interacts with everything else. Poetry invites us to fall in love with this dance. Science charms us with the intricacy and the elegance of it. And theology, at its best, lifts us to the true Reason for the dancing in the first place.”

Robert F. Capon

guess what...

...there really is good news.

God is not angry!

God does not keep score!

God is not distant nor emotionally detached!

God is not easily offended!

God is not waiting to smack you when you mess up!

God is not against you...

in any way...

ever!

Father is for you!

Father is with you!

Father is madly in love with you!

Father enjoys your company!

Father smiles when you smile!

Father laughs at your corny jokes!

Father delights when you see something He has been showing you!

Father loves when you sing - even off-key!

He loves you...

forever...

without limit...

without bribery...

or coercion...

without change...

without end...

Father loves you!

'tis a mystery...

By nature, I am of a curious sort. Drove my folks ding-bats with 'why, what, where, when, who, etc'. I love a mystery, but I also love a mystery solved. Always wanted to know what was going on, why it was going on, what the outcome would be. This penchant for wanting/needing? to know came with me when He appeared in my life years ago - back in the dark ages.

To some degree, I'm still wanting to know. BUT... and this is a big but... I find myself in the 'curious' place of settling into His hands regarding the mystery of His kingdom and the working out thereof. He has brought much peace to my heart regarding the "grand strategies" of His salvation. Truly, I don't believe we humans - with our finite minds, reasonings and studies - can fully grasp this mystery. Or any of the mysteries of God.

Hallelujah, I don't have to figure it out. He does not require me to do so. It is enough - for me - that He has it figured out.

This I do believe in my depths - He never forces anyone to love Him - never forces anyone to follow Him - never forces anyone to desire Him. He could - He has the power - and the right - but I don't think He does.

This I also believe - we come to the Father by the Son and no other way. He does this and accomplishes this in our own lives in His own mysterious way. How? I don't know. But it's ok for me to not know. Just to know that He does it and I can rest in the fact that He is wise, kind, true and just.

Also, in the depths of my heart, I sense that He knows the aborigine in the back side of some dark jungle. He knows if that person's heart's desire is to know the One Who is greater than he. He knows that person has never and will never hear a missionary preach Jesus. And yet… I sense… somehow, in His mysterious way… He is more than able to bring that one in and through and because of Jesus to Himself. I don't believe He forces that one to say `yes' to Him, though.

BUT… and here is another huge `but'… if I am mistaken, and that aborigine is not brought into Jesus - that is ok, too, because He is wise, kind, true and just.

I believe He has `it' worked out - all of it. His working it out has not and will not in any way violate the scriptures nor His revelation of Himself to His creation. How?

It's in His left-hand of power.

In that hand I can rest.

faith... love... wisdom...

Came across this in some old notes - don't know who said it so can't give credit.


"Ask anyone with great faith how they came to it and they will probably tell you about circumstances that would make even a brave man tremble. Ask anyone how they came by great love and they will make you weep with heartache. Ask one with great wisdom how they attained it and they will blush as they tell you of their path of foolishness."

in praise of the ordinary

ordinary
extraordinary
What makes the difference?

Are we to live ordinary lives - be ordinary people - do ordinary things?

What is ordinary, anyway?

Most of us live what could be called ordinary lives. We are those ordinary people doing those ordinary things.

Most of us are not Elijahs or Jacobs or Johns or Pauls. Most of us don't go around the world speaking to millions. Most of us are not even known by the folks who live around the corner and down two blocks - unless our kids know their kids.

We build houses and live in them; we plant gardens and eat the fruit and pick the flowers; we have dogs and cats, gold fish and parakeets, horses and chickens.

We marry and have babies; go to work; go to school; grow up and grow old. We laugh, cry, rejoice and moan. All common. All usual. All normal - and ordinary.

Common - average - usual - middling - standard - normal lives.

What if the ordinary could be something more? Is meant to be something more? Something other than hum-drum and ho-hum?

There's a song that talks about wanting to 'breathe the air like I'm meant to on ordinary days and see the things that I'm supposed to see on ordinary days.'

What if our ordinary days are meant to be extra-ordinary days?

Because He is right here with us, filling each day and each minute with Himself, the ordinary becomes a beautiful golden gift to us of Life - a golden cup containing Him.

The divine is with us transforming the mundane - the average, common, every-day day - into the kingdom of God - at hand - in us - with us.

Oh, let us see the things You desire to show us, let us breathe the air You have for us.

Let us live ordinary days and lives made exquisitely extraordinary - because of You.

can you hear me now...

... not tomorrow

... or yesterday

not in three hours or last night

but now

... today

... this hour - this minute - this very second

Can you hear Me now?

Today - while it is called today - if you will - hear His voice.

How do we do this? How do we hear Him as immediately as now?

Think for a moment about a person you really, really like. One you really, really appreciate. One you enjoy and with whom you just love hanging around. One you would like to get to know better. One you love.

Consider this person feels the same way about you.

Ok, now imagine that you could somehow crawl inside this person - and this person could crawl inside you - all while remaining who you both are. Weird, I know - but think about how very close you two would be. The words 'very close' do not even come near to describing what it would be like.

Now, consider this. He really, really likes you. He appreciates you, enjoys hanging out with you. In fact, He loves you more than you know and He has made the way for Him to be in you - and for you to be in Him.

Really!

Father in Jesus, Jesus in Father... I in You and You in Me and them in Us

This understanding is nothing new. We have heard it for years. We have read the passages of scripture. Probably heard more than one sermon or teaching on it.

Christ in you the hope...

Nevertheless, have we experienced it? Have the words on the page - in the sermon - in the teaching - have those words become life to us? And in us? Has the meaning behind the words - and the transaction - become flesh and dwelt within us? Yet?

For some of us - perhaps many of us - walking in it - living in it - walking it out - living it out - is something yet to be.

Living in this closer than intimate fellowship takes learning. It does not happen overnight. We do not 'hear Him now' just like that. It takes time - it takes learning - it takes living.

It takes getting to know in an incredibly intimate [wish I could come up with a more adequate word] way, the lover of your soul.

It takes learning how to live in that love - how to live loved. Learning how to live in the relationship and fellowship of pure unadulterated, unlimited, unquenchable, unremitting, unquestioned eternal love of Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

It takes practicing His presence - to borrow a title from long ago.

If we want to hear His voice we can - if we will - we can.

If we will.

We can learn to live freely and fully in Him - and let Him live freely and fully in us - if we will.

... but God

Joseph ran into: his brothers; Potiphar; a lusting and lying woman; prison - a dream

- but God

Moses killed an Egyptian - a bush

- but God

Abraham was old and Sarah was barren - a promise

- but God

Elimelech took his wife, Naomi and children to Moab - a gleaning field

- but God

Saul persecuted and killed people of the Way - a light on a road

- but God


Adam and Eve chose independence - an incarnation

- but God

But God

dirt

If you do any gardening, you know that soil makes all the difference.

"... unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much fruit."

We can 'fall' into the soil of the world - or, we can 'fall' into the soil of the Holy Spirit.

Selah

is love a four letter word?

Someone please tell me why we humans are afraid of love. Some of us.

Is it because someone, somewhere along the line in our lives, said, ‘I love you’ and then proceeded to abandon us - either literally or mentally/emotionally?

Is it because someone, somewhere… etc… said, ‘I love you’ then beat us and blamed us for the beating? Or raped us and then said it was our fault because we enticed them?

Is it because someone, somewhere… etc… said ‘I love you’ then betrayed us, talked about us behind our backs, vilified and slandered us to others?

Is it because someone, somewhere… etc… said ‘I love you’ then manipulated us…

and controlled us…

and shamed us…

and…

just generally made life miserable?

Is it because those someones, somewhere who said, ‘I love you’ lived with us in such ways that we were constantly in fear of their displeasure and disappointment?

Is it because of a multitude of reasons I have not named? Because of something so deep in the psyche of man that it has no name? Just a commonality among us all?

Is it possible the “some of us” for whom ‘love’ is a four-letter word, have transferred that feeling/reaction/gut-level pain/fear about love to our relationship with God? To our understanding of Who He is? To what He is made of? To the stuff of His character?

I tend to think it not only possible, put highly likely.

The ‘some of us’ picture Him as being somewhere in the character-realm of emotionally distant, ready to beat us with His spiritual fists, blaming us for His anger toward us, manipulative, controlling, shaming, vindictive, needing to be appeased - an all around fearsome Being.

Not one with whom we want to get close. To say the least.

Let’s change that ‘some of us’ to ‘most of us’. We humans have taken He Who is purely love, and made Him into something far removed from the truth of Who He is - as far as the east is from the west.

We have taken the gospel - the breathtakingly good news - and we have bent it, twisted it, and mangled it into a message of fear. The good news that He loves us with an undying, unchanging, unconditional, unflappable love is overwhelmed by the noise of our understanding and experience of love.

Because of love, and Who He is, He came to make the way for us to be included in the incredibly joyful fellowship between Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

But we fear to even consider this kind of love - because we know it does not exist - it cannot be trusted. It just might make God too good.

We tend to wave it away when someone brings up the passages about God and love. ‘Yes, but…’ we reply. If not aloud - silently in our minds - we deny what those three words, God is love, could really mean. We deny the possibility of His love being true.

We know that not everyone who says ‘I love you’ can really be trusted. It is just words. Words that are so tied to hurt, pain, and emptiness that our gut grips when we hear them.

How can He love us? How can we live in the reality of that love? We dare not believe it is true. We fear lest we be taken in. Again.

It is much safer to relate to Him in the manner of appeasement - do not make waves - be good little boys and girls - and maybe HE will not be angry with us.

Maybe our distrust of love makes us:

fear Who He is - fear what He truly is.

fear how He sees us - fear what He thinks of, feels for, and wants from us.

fear …

fear …

Him …

fear …

Love. Himself.

In Ephesians, Paul prays that Christ would dwell in their hearts - that they would be rooted and grounded in love.

That they, being rooted and grounded in this love, would be able to grasp and understand the love of Christ. To understand to the full the size and shape of that love.

Do you suppose we can put our names in these passages? Do you suppose we could pray that Christ would dwell in our hearts - that we might be rooted and grounded in this love? In His love? That we might understand to the full the incredible dimensions of this love?

This love of Christ, he says, which passes all knowledge?

Do we dare?

Do we dare to hope that love really is good? And doesn’t hurt? And doesn’t betray? Or lie? Or abandon?

Do we dare to believe that His love could possibly surpass all our earthly knowledge and experience of the failings of love?

He says that when we are rooted and grounded in this love - the love of Christ - rooted and grounded in Love Himself - when this happens - we would be filled unto all the fullness of God.

He says that as this happens, we would be coming to know, to learn personally, to experience the very agapē of Christ. That as we are rooted and grounded in love, we come to know love - and as we come to know love, we are more rooted and grounded in love - and on - and on.

And because He is Love - we would be coming to know Love - as it/He is. And be rooted and grounded in Him.

This love - this agapē - sounds like something to be desired - someOne to be desired. The knowledge and experience of something - of someOne - this Love - above all to be desired. SomeOne beyond the ability of our words to describe and define.

Something beyond our earthly knowledge of love.

This Love - no four letter word as we have known - no hurtful thing - no thing to fear.